The Terri Schiavo Wrap-Up: I've had surprisingly little to say on this. It is a subject, when addressed directly, that does not lend itself well to cartoons.

Geek Girl Blonde puts her finger on the core absurdity:

And anyway, Terri Schiavo was given morphine at the end to ease her painless and elegant death. And she was beautiful at the end. I know it’s true because a lawyer said so.

That lucky duck. What a great blessing to have your unfaithful husband and a phalanx of lawyers and judges say to hell with your heartbroken parents and siblings, your husband is boss and if he says you once told him you wouldn't want to live in this 'state,' then by golly what he says goes.

Here's what I'm confident in saying myself: Anyone who claims this national spectacle became what it is due to "just politics" cared for nothing in this situation but just politics.

Why Hate Cats? There are many good reasons to hate cats. One of which is that they hate you, too. Here's the proof:

From the AP/MyWay: Cat Shoots Owner

Tags: Humor Cats Weird

Enormous Omelet Sandwich: It's no Thickburger but they don't start serving those until lunchtime, baby. Here's a quote that won't have its desired effect:

"Americans do not need an Enormous Omelet Sandwich," said Penny Kris-Etherton, a professor of nutrition at Penn State, who noted the sandwich's contents were high in fat and salt and the meal lacked fruit and fiber. "That's too many calories."

From CNN: New Burger King breakfast offering outdoes Whopper

Doublespeak at Fox News: I have to agree with the evil alien overlord, Vexxarr, that Fox News is dealing in doublespeak by embracing the term "homicide bomber" over "suicide bomber". Is the term "kamikaze" too Japanese, too politically incorrect or both?

From Media Matters:
FOX News doctors AP reports to mimic White House terminology

What kind of husband is Michael Schiavo? James Taranto says it better than I can.

According to news reports, Mr. Schiavo lives with a woman named Jodi Centonze, and they have two children together. Surely any court would consider this prima facie evidence of adultery...

The point here is not to castigate Mr. Schiavo for behaving badly. It would require a heroic degree of self-sacrifice for a man to forgo love and sex in order to remain faithful to an incapacitated wife, and it would be unreasonable to hold an ordinary man to a heroic standard.

But it is equally unreasonable to let Mr. Schiavo have it both ways. If he wishes to assert his marital authority to do his wife in, the least society can expect in return is that he refrain from making a mockery of his marital obligations. The grimmest irony in this tragic case is that those who want Terri Schiavo dead are resting their argument on the fiction that her marriage is still alive.

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May the best druggie win! Illegal steriod use in baseball is big in the news. But I say drop all that pretense of fair play. Go for the full-on, 'roid raging, blood vessel popping competition! It will be good for ratings.

From the Small World archives: Drug Competition, August 8,2004

Cartoon Dreams: There are a number really good cartoons and comic strips in the alternative press that too few people get a chance to see. Especially those features that haven't taken a hard left turn. The ones that have just ain't fun anymore. Not so with the dream diaries of "Slow Wave" by Jesse Reklaw.

I have to love this one: Proper Saber Use

Not exactly a new idea: It's a weird but not inconsistent conclusion some are coming to from our advertising culture. I checked eBay on a hunch. Yes, you can bid for ad space on bald heads and this woman's self-proclaimed "hot body". At least she's got her self esteem.

From Yahoo News/USA Today:
Rent this space: Bodies double as billboards

The Opposite of Cat Hatred: Disgustingly cute and quite well done, The Mows comic strip confirms there are still plenty of reasons to hate cats. This one is Reason #10.

Pamela Anderson Update: The blonde bombshell best known for her warheads is back in business. It's a new TV show called "Stacked". Her character works in a bookstore... with stacks of books, get it? And the all-American Hooters restaurant is known for its adorable owl mascot.

From Zap2it: FOX's 'Stacked' on Track for April Debut

A Log in Wired.com's Eye? Unless you're an online ad buyer, you hate those darn "pop-up" ads. Heck, I block 'em myself and this site doesn't carry any. (If you see one, don't blame me. Check your PC for spyware.)

Wired News: Media Sites: Say No to Pop-Ups

After publishing the article, the writer issued this correction: "A stream of reader e-mail has come in, pointing out the irony of a columnist (that's me) criticizing media sites for deploying pop-up ads, only to have his publisher (Wired News) serve up one (for Blockbuster) on this very same column."